Yo mama’s so FAT:
* when her beeper goes off, people think she’s backing up.
* she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
* the last time she saw 90210 was on a scale.
* when she wears a Malcom X shirt, helicopters try to land on her.
* when she auditioned for Indiana Jones, she got the part of the big
rolling ball.
* she couldn’t star in Forrest Gump because she kept eating the box of
chocolates.
* when she sits at the beach, Greenpeace tries to tow her back into the
ocean.
* she was Miss Arizona — class battleship.
* she doesn’t wear Daisy Dukes; she wears Boss Hoggs.
* the National Weather Agency assigns names to her farts.
* her nickname is “DAAAMN!”.
* she lost at Hide and Seek when I spotted her behind the Himalayas.
* I got rich by making her sit on coal.
Yo mama’s so STUPID:
* she took the Pepsi Challenge and chose Jif.
* she thought Beirut was a famous home run hitter.
* she asked me what kind of jeans I had on, I said “Guess”, and she said
“uh, Levi’s?”.
* when I asked her to buy me a color TV, she asked me what color.
* she got fired from a blow-job.
Yo mama’s so UGLY:
* Rice Krispies won’t talk to her.
* she makes blind kids cry.
* she makes onions cry.
* when she threw a boomerang, it wouldn’t come back.
* when she walked into a haunted house, she came out with a paycheck.
Yo mama’s so POOR:
* when I seen her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she
was doing, she said, “Moving.”
* you can’t kill the roaches in your house, cause they pay half the rent.
Yo mama’s so OLD:
* she remembers the Grand Canyon when it was a ditch.
* the key on Ben Franklin’s kite was to her apartment.
* she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
* when she gave birth, YOU came out with dentures.
* Jurassic Park brought back memories.
Yo mama’s (ETC):
* house so small, you ordered a large pizza and had to eat it outside.
* house so small, I threw a rock through your window and it hit everybody.
* house so small, the front and back doors are on the same hinge.