There’s been quite some discussion in a friend’s G+ Stream about Romantic Love, and whether or not it exists.
I maintain that it *does* exist, but that neuroscience goes a long way toward not only explaining the notion of Love – particularly Romantic Love – and even provides some signposts towards behavioral changes you can make in your life *today* that will start to bring about a renewed sense of Love and committment in your life.
Summer Holmquist asked me (and rightly so!), “Jonathon, I would like to know where you are getting your information. Is it from books ( which ones?) Or classes ( again which ones?) Or personal experience and observation?”
I’m very much a ‘show me the numbers, or it’s just your opinion, motherfucker!” kinda guy. So, here’s where I come by my information.
Lately, three books have been tremendously engrossing for me. They are:
The Science of Kissing, by Sheril Kirshenbaum.
59 Seconds – Think a Little, Change a Lot by Richard Wiseman
A Billion Wicked Thoughts: What the World’s Largest Experiment Reveals about Human Desire by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam
The three taken together dovetail into a lovely fusion of concepts ranging from dating to sex to long term relationships. Honestly, they all three are sort of munged together in my brain to an extent. In any case, they each have chapters on love, dating and relationships, and each one is annotated with a full bibliography of sources, which, wherever possible, I consult to form my own opinion of the source material.
The Science of Kissing has a 21 page bibliography.
59 Seconds cites around 25 sources for the chapter on Attraction, and another 20-odd for the chapter on Personality (which is the source for my discussion on the effect of testosterone in the womb)
A Billion Wicked Thoughts – fully half the book (Kindle Edition) is Footnotes and Bibliography.
I’ll sum up my thoughts and bring relevant points Soon™.